As a professional Tarot Reader I have been asked hundreds of questions, such as “Is my husband cheating on me?”, “Will I ever find love again?“, “Am I pregnant?”, “When will I get a new job?“, “Does he love me?“, ” and so forth…
At first glance it’s easy to roll your eyes at some of the questions, but I have learned over the years to take these questions seriously and treat them with respect; after all they reflect my client’s deepest concern/worry/fear/mystery, and it is the main purpose of my work to offer the best and clearest answer I can possibly give.
When I started learning Tarot many years ago, I was taught to ask the “right” questions, and there is no doubt that they do invite insightful and enlightening readings in return.
However, I cannot assume that my clients have had a crash course in Tarot and question phrasing before they contact me for a reading.
Now it no longer feels right for me to make changes to questions, dilute them, make them fit or even make them more vague for the following reasons:
- Rephrasing a question is judgemental. It implies the client is judged as being stupid, silly, careless, dim, ridiculous…etc. Surely he/she could have thought of a more “empowering” or “intelligent” question to ask? Tut tuut…
- Rephrasing a question is condescending and suggests a hint of arrogance. Tarot Readers are NOT superior to their clients, and they shouldn’t give that impression by lecturing them about better choice of words.
- Rephrasing a question is rude. Bear in mind that some clients will feel offended. Do your best to avoid that.
- Rephrasing a question can knock a client’s confidence. They have taken the courage to ask you something that plays on their mind, troubles them, and all they get in return is some “friendly advice” on how to ask the right question. Ouch.
Can you remember your school days, when your teacher said “Don’t be afraid to ask. It doesn’t matter if you think it’s a stupid question. Just ask.” You were encouraged to open up without worrying about being ridiculed, and this is my philosophy when it comes to Tarot questions my clients ask me.
what if you feel uncomfortable answering certain questions?
It’s perfectly okay to say no, and I’m perfectly fine with admitting that my abilities are limited: I’m not a qualified doctor, lawyer or financial adviser, and I cannot connect with dead people.
If I feel uncomfortable with a question, I am honest and let the client know I cannot answer it. It’s the extreme ones like “pregnancy”, which I have to decline, but thankfully they come up very rarely.
My experience over the years has also taught me that many questions I would have dismissed immediately in the past were actually quite interesting on second glance and lent themselves to deeper exploration, just like the famous “Will I ever find love again?”
It is always worthwhile giving any question careful consideration and regard it as an inspirational challenge to answer it with humility, grace and integrity for the highest good of the person, who is asking. So much better than slapping the client in the face with a rephrase.
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